[ This poem/story is too long but too amazing, i wrote it but I've had a little help from my friend Ivana, this poem means a lot to me because it explains how I truly feel and how life is treating me I hope you like it ]
Gazing through the wind
Just like every single one of us
She dreams â?¦
Finding herself left behind
Lost in the woods
Taken by life's crimes
Against man kind
She hopes that someday
She can find herself again
But now she has a constant fear
That she won't find her salvation
Her eyes get swollen
She lingers
Swirling in a lake of lethal poison
Drowning in a pool of crimson tears
Crucifying all of a sudden
The obscenely shadows of her nightmares, her fears
Surrounded by madness, horrified
Looking into this platter containing pieces of her shattered life
Searching for her soul in the silence of ignorance
She is trapped within an immortal lie
Old wounds have awakened to bleed again
Sheâ??s made a disaster out of herself
She cries for the bareness of her thoughts
Too late now to fix anything
Wounds still bleeding
She looks around but only to find there's no way out
Tears of blood going down her soft virgin face
Blood dripping all over the floor
Traces of her bad memories reappear
Never again will she see the sun
It is the dark from now on
Hopelessness kills her
For she hoped life would stop abusing her time after time
But once again her optimism had failed her
She cries for the bareness of her thoughts
Bewildered nightmares of her empty soul
The sky is as dark as she could be
Or maybe is she blind she couldn'tt see
Dying nature her dying core
Dying sounds, crying violins
Broken prayers calling her
Her ghost howling, crawling
Away from her
Alone she walks on this boulevard
Looking for her destiny
Throughout her journey she walks alone
She tries to imagine what serenity would be like
Always wishing she could go back home
She is withering like a dying rose
Voices messing with her conscious
Internal feelings of sorrow filling her mind
She awaits her sweet revenge
Her sinful beauty no longer shows
Sinless victim she shall remain
Her morbid thoughts are beyond imagination
Always seeking grace
Yet she cannot find it
Wandering in this cave of sin
Haunted by gloom
Bowing posture of her body wall
She views the other side of the cursed land
For she is cursed
Words of sin
Sinisterly echoed in her ears
Words of sin
Slaughtered her sickened soul
Today is the day she declares her surrendering
For she had suddenly become the curse itself
Ever since the world sinisterly smiled away
Beautiful scars marked along her liquid skin
Sickened by life's fatal treatment
Her body aches as she goes through the lucid darkness
Shivering like a cold angel
Walking through life itself
Unnoticed
Thoughts blackened by the essence of pain
Lost she will remain
Still awaiting her salvation
Tears drop again
No longer can she handle this aggression
Lifting her head high
Nothing changed
Beautifully chaotic angel
Lonely as she could be
Brainwashed with her body shaking
But still weirdly not giving up
She has lost a lot
Sacrificing dearly
Morbid princess watching herself
Turning into the mother of shadows
Yet feeling hurt and in need
Praise her a moment of peace
Ghosts joining her
Helping her find the missing puzzle piece
Wanting to run away from the dark
Longing to find the light
But she is immobile
Sitting under a tree
Can't seem to stop the madness
Yes she is filled with hopelessness
Along her path she meets
A desiccated corpse
A dying angel
Now she prepares herself for the worst
An image of her wrapped in barbed wire
Feeling in love with a lot of things
And yet hating everything
And now she had become
The forgotten
Once awaken
Crimson tears she had shed in her dream
Had darkened her hands in velvet red
And flooded her bed with sorrow and pain
She knew that her destiny can no longer be found
Again she fails one of life's tests
Faithless she finds a knife with her name on it
A knife that would end her dreams
A knife in which her destiny was hidden
Hesitatingly she holds it
Feeling it, staring at it
Her reflection shows her reality
A life of loss
An image of anarchy
Unsure of herself she holds the knife
With this sinful knife she draws a line
Across her thin sinless neck
Feeling the desire
Wanting more hurt
Not caring about the shedding blood
Inflicting more pain
She whispers the venom of life
Until, hushed as a grave, she is gone to blazes
Finally she reaches the veins
Saying her last goodbyes
She dies
