Mixed Emotions

How can I feel both love and hate?
Why can't I just get my feelings straight?
You have no idea what you put me through.
Such pain and confusion if only you knew.
You blindly took a knife to my heart,
Leaving only but a tiny part.
A part just big enough to feel
Wishing this pain wasn't so real
Wishing I could forget that look in your eyes
So I can stop myself before I cry
Wanting to forget your smile
And forget I was ever in denial
Thinking there was a chance of you and me
But the tears refuse to cease
The fog clears and i can see.
Here before me is the truth unwinding
I'd like to think that it was just my timing
But in my heart I know that's not the case
Because all I was doing was running and endless race
Out of breath and unable to stand
You have no idea I put my heart in your hands...