Him and drugs

So he takes another puff
Hoping it will take away all the things that went wrong in his day. Hes living a life that he doesn't want. The people, the places he goes there just not the same.
He calls to say he loves me and see how my day went. And when I say "Alright," thats not what I really have to say.
What i really want to say is " I think about you all day long, and i want u to know that i love u" I just try to force a smile, blink away the tears
I'm supposed to be strong, supposed to have no fears but i`m finding it hard not to frown if I'm such a strong person why am i breaking down?I only have 2 fears left.... Loosing you and fearing death. If I had to choose a first.Loosing you would be the worst.You see thats why I'm still here, hanging on with every tear.Seeing you gives me a genuine smile.It makes my life a little less vile. I want this too last long. Cause you mean more to me then anyone ever has . You cant say "you know"but u cant possibly know how i feel.You say you can't stop thinking this way that all u do is play these games. I no longer can cry so i say " i don't care" when you know it will be with me every moment to spare. Cause i really care! Some say that I'm a fool to love you that I'm to dumb to know whats right for me! but i know I need you here with me. And as I sit here and think of you I'm reminded of all the reasons I love you Your smile,and the way it makes everything OK Your laugh, and the way it brings such life into me Your eyes, and the way they seem to read my thoughts. Just think is life really so hard that its worth losing, losing your family, losing me ........losing everything.Is it worth loosing us over.Don't forget u promised me forever.