Why am I still screaming?
Why do I keep falling?
You push me down
And I tumble
The fall, so long, so far
A broken arm, a badly sprained leg
The light is shining brightly down
Burning into my eyes
I open my eyes and look up around me
This isn't heaven, it isn't hell
It's not even in-between
Its just existence
Staying, waiting
Falling, broken
I fell down the stairs again
I wasn't pushed, I tripped that's all
How can you explain?
You didn't fall and you were pushed
By invisible hands that no-one can see
I never tried to kill myself
I never slit my wrists
I never made a pretty noose
From which to hang and die
I never swallowed the box of pills
That they found empty in my room
I just wrote the list they found
Of my dying requests
The music at my funeral
And who I want as guests
I've got to see a councillor
They think they know what's wrong with me
But I never let them in
They never see inside my mind
The horrors that I've seen
I never tried to kill myself
I just fell down the stairs
No-one tried to break my arm
I just ran into a wall
No-one tried to stab me
The scissors slipped in cut and paste
I'm just accident prone you see
Accident seems to follow me
Why doesn't accident like me mummy?
Why does he hurt me all the time?
Was it something I did mummy?
I'm sorry please I'm sorry
I don't like accident mummy
I don't like him at all
I'm gonna say goodbye now mummy
I'm taking my last fall
Daddy it's too late now
You were never there
Why didn't you try to help me daddy?
Why did you just stare?
I hate accident mummy
He won't let me be free
He's the one that tried to kill me
He's the one that made me bleed
He tried to end my life three times
Yet now he won't let me leave
Who is accident? I wonder
And what is in his head?
I thought he wanted me cold mummy
Dark and cold and dead
Now he wants me living mummy
So he can cause more pain instead
I fell down the stairs again
I got bumped and bruised my head
It made me write the poem mummy
So you would know what's going on
I know I'm not a happy girl
I know I'm a changed child
I'm sorry I don't talk anymore
So I thought I'd give you an insight
To what's happening inside my head
It's not all black and white
It's been happening for years now
Eight to be precise
And accident is always there
Except when it is night
Iâ'm going to go to sleep now
But I can' say goodnight
My eyes are bright red now
The sadness I can't fight
