What is Happening??*Mandz

Life's taking its course
And I just happen to be getting worse
But as long as you are here
I'm not going anywhere
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I just wanted to say I love you
And I'm sorry for everything you have gone through
My sadness is getting stronger
It's hard, but I can't hold on any longer
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Depression has got the best of me
The chains I'm in won't let me free
My heart just keeps on hurting
And people say I'm just learning
~~~~~~~
But four years of learning is way to long
My life has been like a heart breaking song
Of all the tears I have shed
Of all the days I wish i were dead
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All the days I wished I died in bed
All the thoughts running through my head
For you, life is just beginning
For a happy human being
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But for when I die
Don't mourn or cry
You know I love you and I care
But I'm sorry the pain is just to hard to bare
~~~~~~~~~
But when I'm in a happy place
I will. trust me, I will have a real smile on my face
Just don't make the mistake I will
Because for me it will just kill
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Crying, hurting and my sad ending
For my life is not mending
Yes, I know this is severe
But this has been my biggest fear
~~~~~~~~~
Life and death have balanced out
But it seems like death is winning without doubt
Yeah i know its scary, for me too
But you don't know half the stuff I have gone through
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The breakdowns you have seen
Ya me too, they've made a big scene
They are bad, they put me in tears
And the end seemed so near
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The scary part is I've gone through those alone
In what people call their safe place my home
I sit in the corner and cry till no end
But when people start to hear my live their hearts start to bend
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My life ends with a slow painful good-bye
But promise me you won't be sad and cry
Think of all the happy times
And hopefully this won't be my last rhyme