Looking for some hope

You know that feeling
the one in the deepest part of your heart
that maybe your about to give up
that your falling apart

and the people you thought you could count on
always have to leave
and they tell you it'll be okay
(but your finding that hard to believe)

and it hurts to fake a smile
and you stare at your shoes in the hallways
and hope that nobody will notice
the tear streaks on your face

your afraid it will be too late
and this pain is becoming too much
you look at the knife, the safety it holds
you desire to feel its touch

you know your lying to yourself
you become anorexic to be thin
and every single night
this terror drags across my skin

you slam your bedroom door
and lay the drugs out on your desk
take one last look at your suicide note
and hug it tightly to your chest

it says your sorry, and that its not their fault
it says i know im hurting you, but its hurting me even more
as the drugs sink in she says her last prayer
and hopes god will catch her as she collapses on the floor