Is this real?

by Leanne   Jan 15, 2007


I try to run
Yet my feet won't move
If I don't go now
My life I will lose

My legs feel stiff
And my heart beats fast
Too many times
This has happened in the past

The icy wind blows
Chilling me to the bone
Not far from behind me
I hear a dreadful moan

My hairs stand up
And my sight goes dim
I suddenly start moving
Energy from every limb

I sprint up the path
Trees sway on either side
Searching for my house
I just want to get inside

The path is getting smaller
Trees all closing in
I wonder how I got here
How did this all begin?

One moment I was standing
At the bottom of my bed
When I got the strangest feeling
A tingling in my head

Next thing I remember
I was staring at the floor
Darkness all around me
The rain began to pour

Thats when it started
When I knew something was wrong
I need to get away from here
Its not where I belong

And I know there's someone out there
A presence I can feel
I wonder who or what it is
Or even if its real

Eyes searching frantically
For a safe place to hide
I slowly start to realise that
My sense of security is denied

The air is getting misty
As the fog rolls in thick
Just up ahead I hear
The snapping of a stick

Lightning strikes and blinds me
A searing pain runs through my head
The fog instantly fades
As I wake up in my bed.

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Latest Comments

  • 18 years ago

    by skynerraw

    This is a great poem! So are the rest of yours you're really talented, I hope I will be able to write poems like this someday!

  • 18 years ago

    by BrixGoesxRawr

    I really like this it flowed well.. I don't think you should really change anything. I like it the way it is. Except for a few spelling mistakes. Which is common:

    I sprint up the path
    Trees sway on ether side ['ether' I think you meant 'either' I'm not sure though?]

    I slowly start to realise that [realize]

    & Remember, Capatalize your I's. :]

    Sorry! I know I keep bringing them up. But they bother me if I notice them.. Lol. Sometimes I don't. If you get annoyed with me pointing them out.. Just tell me. I'm really sorry. I just want to help out :]

    other than that, I really liked it.. Maybe expanding your vocabulary will make it more interesting as well.

    Great job. Keep it up, Hun. You're very talented.

    Bri.x

  • 18 years ago

    by angelina

    Ooo i like this one also ... it is the best one soo far ... i really am begining to like your work

  • 18 years ago

    by Jenni Marie

    Nooooooo no editing, I love it the way it is!
    And you kept saying you had no idea where it was going, yet I think it turned out brilliantly! *Glares* No editing ya hear? Lmao
    xx

  • 18 years ago

    by Gem

    Well if you decide to edit it, be careful with you change cos it's brilliant. You kept up the steady rhyming thoughout which gave it an almost fluid flow and your words were brilliant, they seemed to speed up and slow down in my mind as i read when certain things were being described.
    I loved it =)
    5/5
    *Gem*

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