The Devil goes to the Dentist

Eric the Antichrist sitting by the phone
Flicking through the personal ads home all alone
Fun loving dentist with wild auburn hair
Crazee attitude like the devil may care,
Catches his eye on its way to the floor
He bites his tongues as he files down his claw
And a gleam shines brightly in his dull dead eyes
A trip to the dentist, what a wicked surprise!

Our Middle class hero starts another day
Thinking of the weekend, sailing round the bay
Mrs. Jones then Mr. Jones then Cynthia Double barrel
With one glass eye, a botox smile and a tarantula named Harold
Then a new patient, Mr. Nicholas Strange
Announced the receptionist slightly deranged
Pleased to meet you,I guess you know my name,
But what's puzzling you is why I came

I read your ad in the Fortune Review
I love a good time what shall we do?
You should know Mr. Strange I'm said to be fast
Can you keep up the pace; do you think you could last?
Ive dined married women and even some ladies
From Surinam to the banks of the Hades
I can give you the world, dedicate a disease
Walk on the moon if that should so please

I can show you twenty seven different levels of Hell
Hmmm, I once lived in Cleveland, seems you did as well?
Well thanks for your offer, so charming and kind,
But our stars don't match, we're quite different signs
And I've had demon lovers writhing in bed
Who turned out to be snakes who messed with my head
I've seen things in this room that would bring men to tears
So your dangerous delights hold me no fears

Temptation and pleasure, torment and lies
My hell is right here behind these dark eyes
So behind me Satan, go and be gone
I've a two o'clock appointment coming along
Damn! These women are beguiling but armored and tough
I need mortals to play with of much lesser stuff
And with a grin he demanded bring me more coal!
I'm told there are politicians who still have their souls !