Darkness

Hate those types of comments ^^^ seems like they're not really readin the poem. Anyways on this line:

"A cry for help that everyone ignore"

Add an 's' at the end of ingore

This:

"A child's mind in an adults
body wanting to be seen and heard"

Okay on this I would have it be like the word body next to adults and then wanting... will have its own line so it'd be:

A childs mind in an adults body,
Wanting to be seen and heard

Same with this:

"Asking but not saying hoping
someone will notice."

But hoping on the next line.

And ones like this:

"A child found, not just another
face. A voice that grows stronger"

I dont really like when a thought is put on to the next line and it ends with a period. So the one like this try to not put a period in between a line, make one thought one line so it'd be:

A child found, not just another face.
A voice that grows stronger

Like that. Oh one last thing, I think if you put this in stanzas it'd give it structure. Its just my opinions, I hope I didnt sound rude or anything I just wanted to be honest!

OMFG your poems are totally awsome!!! and thanks for the comment on my poems!!!
you rox

I liked the poem.. the structure could use some work though.

did you comment me becuz i posted a double or w/e board. cuz i cant find if i had posted a board saying ill comment back twice as much. so just let me.