If i had a dieing wish

Your title got my attention which is the best way of getting people to read your stuff in my opinion.

your servant:
david

I liked this one..its short, yet meaningful, nice job. :)

Definitly my favorite so far.. the emotion was greater in this poem than any of your others and the flow is nice.. the impact is strong because you repeat "if i had a dieing wish"

you may want to edit it though because some words are comming out funny like this

"I donâ??t want you to see"

^^ see what i mean.. it happens to my poems sometimes too