When you left

Spending long nights crying myself to sleep.
Never knowing were you would be.
Wondering if you would stay or leave.
Wondering when I could lean on you.
Constantly wondering were you would be in the world tomorrow.
Never knowing if you were dead or not.
If you ask me that's too much for a 15 year old to bear.
I don't have to worry,
But I do.
I do because I care.
Many people wouldn't,
After all the things you've done.
There's something about me,
That won't let me give up on you.
I love you with all my heart.
You don't understand,
What you've put me through these last 14 years.
I've had to pretend to hate your guts.
I wonder why I don't really.
For the last 6 years,
I've gone through hell for you.
You broke my heart when you left.
I've gotten over it.
Maybe sooner than I should have.
You're my brother.
I will always love you.
Nothing you ever do or say,
Ever change that.