Forever Lost

Woke up early this morning
too early to remember
wonder how much I really slept

nose and throat burn today
more than they should
blood stains the pillows

my legs are shakey
unstable to walk properly
where has my control gone to?

empty bottles and cans litter the room
yet I am still underaged
evidence shows what I already knew

fingernails caked in powder white
hazel eyes glazed; glassy shine
stomach churning yet I'm still...

the fever spreads like a new disease
and I've dreamt this dream before
a thousands times over

forever ago I lost this wish
Where are you?
Who am I?

All washed down one more time
with stale liquor long forgotten
and burnt ashes of memories..