Wanderer

A wanderer
is split from society.
Hmm it's a good intro.

You are a zombie
doomed from death.
^I don't really like how you changed it from as if you were talking about just a person, and then change it specifically to "you" but thats just me..

You are lost
in a sewer of sorrow.

You are a stranger
to faces old and new.

Your life is a mystery
in a mist of mockery.
^There's a lot of repetition here with the "you"'s and "your"'s, Maybe try and switch it up a bit?

Endurance is hard,
for ease lies east.
^haha, cute.

Darkness dives deep
as a creep of the night.
^I like the wording.

Wandering is no way for you,
for wade in water
wakes the world in wonder.
^This is a thing with you isn't it? Changing the lines randomly? lol.

Overall, it was good. I liked it, very well done. :)

Amazing. I just realized you used the same form in your other poems. I like it. I think it's a different way of writing..it's very effective. I really enjoy your work. Shanik

I like it. for this is really what a wanderer is. but a wonderer can be so much more. and you show that in your poem. i like it.

"You are lost
in a sewer of sorrow."

Wow this was great.
The flow in this one is very good.
I can almost feel the mystery, loved reading it. Good job :)

5/5

Thank you for commenting on my work, it's very much appreciated. :)

Take care,

angelique

Great poem, loved it.