As I write this tears are falling off my face and onto the floor,
thinking about cutting again but trying to fight it, but all I want to do is cut myself because the pain I feel now is unexplainable it feels like a thousand knifes hitting every my body, and when the blade touches my skin it makes the pain numb, I have a dad that aint helping out, I have my mom trying to change me into a girly girl but I'm sorry that isn't me, I'm a rocker I like skulls, black clothes, but no you want me to wear pink and green fruity colors but like I said that isn't me,
pictures of me cutting myself flashback in my head like a sound less movie....
Looking threw old papers and finding papers when I first started writing half of the papers had blood on it so I dedicated to burn them, as much as that hurt to do that I had to because all memories came back and the blade was calling my name, I blasted my rock music so loud that nobody
could hear me scream at the top of my lungs, everything I hate revoles around me, everything that my family goes threw is because of me, my poems are shit because they don't rhyme, I feel like I'm losing time, my words are shit people they don't mean nothing I'm not going to get
anywhere with them and then some people say you got talent, but really I don't even know who I am anymore, I know I'm Alissa but its like the person I became I don't even know who she is, I would look in the mirror and don't even reconize myself, I don't smile because I aint happy....
why should you smile if you aren't happy? Everybody says behind a smile lies everything so why would you want to hide everything? Ill just walk around with my head down, with a frown on my face, so everybody knows I'm sad I aint going to hide it anymore I'm going to show it because this is my life story.......
