What I want?

Confused

Denying the tears
they fill my eyes
I can feel my heart slowly
it's scolding my lies

taunting my every breath
letting it go so quick
every ounce of control
too fast to predict

fighting my soul, my heart
it's simply pleading with it
tormenting my thoughts
tempting my will to live

I can hear you whisper
you don't hear my desperate cries
wishing you could see...
but this opaqueness fills the void

I don't expect you to understand
I would never ask you to decode my thoughts
all I'll do is answer your question
with a single shot

what I want? you