Addiction

I wrote this years and years ago, i only found it today tucked into my memory box under my bed.

It's boring adoring the one I can't get.
Together, forever, it should have been set
Hers is a bliss that you wish to forget.
In motion, my devotion in concrete is set.

My love persists to exist; that's my only concern.
The sight of her, right here, my stomach will churn.
Her touch is what causes me so much to yearn.
Slightly contrite to think her love I could earn.

Delightfully blighted, so what's to be learned?
Look back and glance at the chances I've spurned.
Hearts on the line are designed to be burned.

Can't get her, she's better than I guess I deserve.
Out of reach, so I'll teach myself to preserve.
So much toil that spoils my love that's conserved.
She's the one that's now gone, but holds my love reserved.

Should've told her, behold how I really feel.
That my love above all else is real.
Inside my mind I confide and always conceal.
Wouldn't mind but now surely it's time to be real?

I'm surprised by eyes that the lies shine through.
Disguised my pride, but denied something true.
My addiction's the fiction of her loving me too.