Double Sided Coin

by Beyond Repair   Oct 8, 2007


What you say doesn't matter, Your point is moot
Why bother trying, when you always lose
Roll the dice, heads or tails, all logic fails
You're the hack, just a joke, your just a toy
The victim of a double sided coin

The dice are weighted, the coin is faded
It could go either way, But today's not your day
Trusts me I know, don't try to go toe to toe
With the dealer, cause he will dig you deeper
If you think that's even possible
Trust me he'll show you a whole new low

Some are predators some are prey
You'll know how it feels either way
You can read it on her lips
She's the shark and you're the fish

What you say doesn't matter, Your point is moot
Why bother trying, when you always lose
Roll the dice, heads or tails, all logic fails
You're the hack, just a joke, your just a toy
The victim of a double sided coin

She planned it all along, never had a chance but it didn't feel wrong
But as the cards are turned face up, I can feel it in my gut
You did it you won, the bluff never thought that could be done
The coin reads heads I picked tails, I was told once that it never fails
Looks like they were wrong, both sides read what I should have done

Took a gamble, Thought I was able, but now I see
That the person I lost to was me
I cant take back the things that I lost
I wish I knew how much it would have cost
To see that It was me the whole time
Crazy what a loser may find

What you say doesn't matter, Your point is moot
Why bother trying, when you always lose
Roll the dice, heads or tails, all logic fails
You're the hack, just a joke, your just a toy
The victim of a double sided coin

***Still needs work, but tell me what you think.***

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by ali

    Hey
    i think that this piece is another awesome one, again just like a song. it flows really well and the emotions are clear... good stuff there
    it kinda reminds me of motorhead's 'ace of spades' in a way, sooo good!!! 5/5 defo

  • 16 years ago

    by Pete

    I really like this poem, it's well thought out and the gambling jargon adds a certain edge to the whole piece.
    I like the repetition on the first stanza throughout, gives it something to join your other stanza's up.

    My main concern is with your 5th stanza. The words in this stanza are brilliant, but the structure worries me. You have 17 syllables in your first line of that stanza, most of the lines in your other stanza's have between 7 - 10.

    I love how the rhyme scheme is for this stanza but i think the con's of this structure outweigh the pro's.

    Obviously only my personal opinion though.

    With the smallest bit of work it would be a 5 in my eyes.

    Nice work overall.
    [4/5]

  • 16 years ago

    by Independence Forever

    I liked the predator and prey part the best, it flowed very well and it was easy to read because of that, very good poem

    your servant:
    atticus

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