Losing...

If I stop then I'm a coward,
If I fight then I'm to fail,
My faith it is devoured,
I have no heaven nor a hell.

My choices are my own;
I've no reason to expain.
Deep inside I feel alone;
I must ease this pain.

Few friends are around,
Yet those I push away.
I wish not to be found,
For my serenity I pray.

A part of me it beckons,
But this part it cannot see.
And I have but seconds,
indecisive; still not free.

In between my fingers,
Life begins to slip,
So I tighten my grasp,
but I worry of my grip.