I enjoyed this piece alot to tell you the truth. I believe the line you used for repetition was effective. I like the use of "Silently, Sweetly" Though sometimes it felt like it dragged the flow a tiny bit off, nothing to damage this poem though of course that's just my personal opinion. OR my sucky reading atm. This imagery within this is vivid and capturing. I liked the dark effect you portrayed over the atmosphere with a touch of sadness. An almost sadistic piece. Well done. You both have written well together. Definitly a 5/5 from me. ~Mel

Wow! Incredible piece, so intense and filled with captivating, dark atmosphere. I love powerful expressions and metaphor for whole piece is very effective. Well done, you both did a fantastic job, so compact piece that kept my attention in every line. I honestly can't chose my favorite stanza, great imagery, very vivid, too. You deserved top grades for this one.

Wow...
You two did amazing job o this poem. Whole piece is truly flawless, it has perfect flow and it is really excellently written. I like the choice of words a lot, and the descriptions are so vivid. The repetition of the first line in every stanza is truly effective.
Fantastically done!
5/5 from me

I just loved the imagery here, it was meaningful and deep. The words you chose were powerful and truly made the poem perfect for me. The flow was flawless and you had me hooked from the first line. Well done *5/5*

Wow! This poem was outstanding. It flows really well, the rhyming is perfect, and there's meaning behind the words. Definate 5/5 <3<3

Wow. I really liked it. It was written really well. You two did an outstanding job on this piece.

Fading away from this life without another trace.

^ I loved how that ended.

Really good job. 5/5 from me.

Wow this poem is so great.. i think i've read this before but i forgot to comment on it.. it really flows magnificiently! this is a great collab.. no doubt about it.. this is a 5/5! =D

Wow i never read a collab before but i have to say its a wonderful outstanding poems i loved it....=) 5/5

WOW!!!This was superb!!!the ryhming was really good!! and excellent choice of words!!
5/5
tcs
= )

Sometimes when two people write something you can tell. I couldn't
Great Job
5

Very good poem

A perfectly assembled piece, everything in balance. Insightful repetition that works with every line as ever good repeated line should. I feel this is just what I needed to read tonight.

You both did a great job each line came to life as the imaginary metaphor of the poison expressed intense emotion

amazing 5>>>>>>>>>>