MEMORIES WILL NOT EVER LEAVE

Speaking of the past and it is true
Yesterday is still there
Today is still here, never leave
Tomorrow is still running those memories.

This is very hard to tell my personal life, which you will never forget. Which you know the fact about me and have encourage to tell you because of you admire me in many ways, a role model to look up to, and you took best positive, whoever I comment your personal life.

Once a life, a childhood must be so unforgettable.
All the children think their life won't be in hell
my soul, my happiness, and my smile has farewell
I hid my emotion, couldn't run and tell

As a child, oh mercy, I was small deaf child.
yes, can't speak or hear but is a blessing I can see
Moved to another state to meet siblings.
As a child, oh mercy, I was so happy.

Wondering who I am to them,
Wondering what I am to them
Wondering what love can they share.

As a child, oh mercy I was only six year old
Living a perfect life turn out nightmare, so cold.
My father introduced me his son
My parents left, and this what memories begun

As a child, oh mercy, I was alone
I wandering out on the beautiful field
He came along, something I should shield
I continued look at the beauitful flowers
he handed me a lolly pop, I licked for hours

As a child, oh mercy, I thought of the best day ever
He pulled my right hand, our bond going last forever
The moment I saw the forest, my heart stopped
Trying to talk, trying to scream, dropped lolly pop.

As a child, oh mercy, I was so frighten of him.
He dragged me, I fell on pile of dirt, crying for help
I looked at the house, it was so far away to run
He still pulling me, and it wasnt not fun
As a child, oh mercy, I was just stuffering.

He hold my legs down, all he ever did said shh
I look up, crying out loud thinking of my parents
He is bigger than me, I am so little, seem apparent.
dirt is my weapon, I threw whole a lot in his face
He holded me down, unzip my short, hes disgrace
As a child, oh mercy, as only child can't be strong

Pleasing myself, trying to say no no no
He didn't understand me, he already started
I scream so loud, loud as ever the world can hear
It was too late to escape and has so many tear
As a child, oh mercy, I felt so much pain

As soon he done, he careless left so quickly
What he have did horrible was so slickly
I lied down, confused of him have took my virginity
The sun are still there, and it was like infinitiy
As a child, oh mercy, I wouldn't forget this feelings.

As I stood up, I pulled up my short and walk slowly
Everytime I took a step, it's pinched so badly
I went in my room, lay down on my bed quietly
Couldn't sleep, my eyes brimmed with tear
Why couldn't be happy, why him doing this to me.
As a child, oh mercy, my memories are disgusted

Finally my parents came home, feel so safe
They came to my silbing, I felt as waif
I ran to my daddy in no fear, hold him so tight
He hugged me and give me kisses, feels so right
The horrible boy stood there, like he in fright.

I tried to tell my daddy, I tried to talk
I tried to explain, and he came closer as he walk
I realized I have no words coming out mouth
As feeling of no luck, he took advantaged of me
as a child, oh mercy, i was in a horrible place.

He smiled at me, like he won the fight.
I couldn't cry, couldn't get out of his sight.
As a child, what can I do to is was live
The memories are still in my head
Can't get rid of it, memories won't be dead
I always left behind and not ever pull me down
But my memories will NOT never LEAVE!

He is not my blood and he is not my friend
He is nowhere close to me, not as my brother
he will always be my enemy as today and forever
When I started talking when I was 6 1/2 years old and When I was turned 12 years old, I finally understood what is rape, after all those years I hold my pain and anger was finally free. I told my parents, they was so panic and believing in me. My dad hold me so hard, kisses me everywhere and saying sorry, wish he can see what I've been through. My dad hated him, and I hate him so much that he ruin my childhood. When my daddy passed away, he was there at the funeral and asking for forgiven, I don't think my daddy would never forgive him cause I wouldn't accept his as much he did to me and I felt very brave to ingore him. And it was hard to say what I've been through, I hope doesn't waste your precious time read this. *I definitely can hear and talk very good*