GREAT REPLY

HE: Can I have your name?
SHE: Why? Dont you already have one?

GREAT REPLY

HE: Hi, Didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice?
SHE: Must've been once. I never make the same mistake twice.

GREAT REPLY

HE: What would you say if I asked you to marry me?
SHE: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time.

GREAT REPLY

HE: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
SHE: If I saw you naked, I'd die laughing

GREAT REPLY

HE: Your face must turn a few heads.
SHE: And your face must turn a few stomachs.

Men are like...Mascara.
They usually run at the first sign of emotion.

What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere?
"Hold my purse."

You laugh because I'm different...
I laugh cause I just farted!

It takes 46 muscles to frown...but only 4 to flip 'em the bird.

Girls are like phones.
We love to be held, talked too...
But if you press the wrong button you'll be disconnected!