Sick Part One

by Steven Topaz   Mar 9, 2009


In a world of sick twists,
Light is only to be blinded by the dark,
Where also our smiles are amiss.

In a world of sick twists,
all memories and moments of bliss,
are forced to be forgotten and missed

In a world of sick twists,
watch as every smile and laugh,
is countered with melancholic aftermath

In a world of sick twists,
True love can't overwhelm the memories,
instead it reminisces broken histories.

And in a world of sick twists,
They all watch as another tear sheds,
Broken and hungry,yet to be fed,

And watch as every tear is never spoken, never said,
And watch as this sick world of twists, gets to your head,
And watch us sitting here crying on our broken bed,
And i sit here watching your scars slowly turn red,

But in this sick world of twists,
I remind you of the ring..
making it so light nor dark
may triumph over our melancholic twilight,

In this sick world of twists,
Emotions are tangled,
Wrists are mangled,

In this sick world of twists,
through depression and tears.
Watch the weakening of my fears,

In this sick, sick world,
Love is mysteriously strengthened,
Through tears and depression.

This is the first poem ive written thats actually managed to make me cry because it means alot to me, so some statements on how this poem struck you would be nice

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  • 8 years ago

    by Hollow Emotion

    I really liked the emotion and power words you put into this. It definetly puts a new view on society not being perfect, as some may think it is. This world if far from perfect, and you showed it well with your invigorating words. Nice Job!

  • 8 years ago

    by Italian Stallion

    Okay so I figured if I am going to read part two I should read part one first, so here I am. I must admit, at first glance, I thought this was going to be horrible due to the amount of repetition; however, you proved me wrong. I really liked how you manovered your wording so that it was saying the same thing, but slightly different. It was set up as before, during, and after, to a certian degree.

    The messege within this piece was very evident that this was close to you at the time of writing. Everything you said here I can agree on and I'm sure many others can and will too.

    Overall a wonderful write, keep up the great work.

    Peace, Joe

  • 8 years ago

    by kelleyana

    I think too much repetitions turns off this poems, especially you use it with rhyming, so again thats the onlything i did not like much. Overall it was a good poem.

  • 8 years ago

    by RoseBlood

    I am in the middle of a heartbreak, and depression is overhelming me...and your poem just made all those tears I have been hiding fall down like raindrops. This is one of the most beautiful poems I have ever read. And I wish there was a grade higher than 5 to give you.
    The new world is perfect, but I just don't know how love gets stronger by depression and tears.
    But who knows, may be you're right?
    Excellent work. 5/5.

  • I like how you expressed youself.i wish i new why the world was like this why people do what they do i know what it feels like when people do what they do but you did good keep it up im looking forward to reading more of you poems 5/5 you have made my favorite list