Stopped

After so many times
Of me jumping in the water
Just to feel your hands
Shoving me under the waves...
I stopped trying to learn how to swim

And after so many months
Of me calling and visiting you
Just to hear your voice and body language
Telling me that you wanted nothing to do with me...
I stopped trying to be your sister

After so many years
Of doing everything you said and getting all A's
Just to hear the numbness of your silence
Showing me you weren't really paying attention...
I stopped trying to be good enough

After all the times
I gave my love and my ears
Just to get nothing emotional back in return
Proved to me what I've suspected for a while...
And I stopped trying to pretend this still felt like home

After another two years
When you finally wake up from this comatose state of emotion
Just to realize I've already gone
I hope it reminds you that you lost me
Way back when you stopped trying to be there

Copyright 2009 S. Sieglaff