Departing

Great work...sorry the to hear it didn't work out.

For 'random ramblings' this is remarkable. I got that it was about the love you lost but not that he'd actually died. This has brought back a lot of my own memories for me and has inspired me. A brilliant piece and indeed very vibrant. I'm sorry you're through such pain but you are writing works of art. Keep releasing girl. Love you.

Danika.

"Catch me if you can", screams a
striped paper that should be ripped.
Funny how even these lines do not
wish to hold memories of you-
I thought I was the only one.

- So that was an interesting openeing because it did not give much away about what this poem would be about but flowed in a nice way that made me interested and want to read on. It is clear there is someone on your mind while writing this but the relationship unsure.

I remove this black veil that checkered
my vision because truth be told, I haven't
even begun planning the funeral of our
deceased love. My calendar holds words
that end in "day", yet I can't help but wonder
why I keep mourning in the darkness?

- It becomes more clear here that you are talking about your partner and what I really liked about this stanza alone is that this person doesn't have to be dead. This verse could be related to with the end of a relationship if they have simply walked away from you and meant everything to you. I would imagine this would feel similar.

Probably because these curtains have
been closed since the day you left and
these lights have been turned off since
I last needed to see your shadowed face.

- total devastation and loss here. :( I lost my fiance and this is exactly how I felt, like my whole world was just dark and there would never be light again no matter how many people tried to put bulbs in front of my face. It is such a lonely aching place to be.

Dust has made its home on top of mine
and mold has grown on dishes that
you last ate out of. Infecting my lungs-
I invite it.

- this shows how much you do not want to move on, when we lose someone close we have that moment where we stay still, because it hurts to look back but it is too hard to move forward and so we stay still and try to keep everything around us the same as it was before they left. In some way it makes us feel like they are not so far away.

because really, what's the point of craving
clean oxygen when my reason for living
has parted?

- really well worded Chels, I felt this way and truly thought there was no point in living because all of my future had just gone. It seemed like there was nothing left.

You refuse to hold me any longer so
I wish to die in a bed that held us both.

- this again relates to the ending of a relationship and the love, not only the death of that person. Just the end of a relationship, when you feel them slipping away and it feels like they are going to go, you think you cannot ever live without them.

I wrap the DNA you left in the sheets
around me. Even in death, I want to take you
with me. Your scent, your skin, your memory.

- it is so sad to feel this strongly about someone and either have it taken away from you, or to not have it returned.

How could I travel in the afterlife without
the slightest notion of you?
How am I even surviving now?

- good ending because it shows your state of mind is in confusion and grief and loss.

I like this poem because I believe it could mean the death of a loved one, or the end of a relationship which has meant everything to someone.

I did get teary reading this because I connected with the poem so much and your words were very touching.

Powerful, emotional poem.

Strong..

Excuse my language, but holy shit. This is deep, Chels...very deep. Planning the funeral for your love... my god. My heart can't take it.

The imagery in this is amazing. The closed curtains, dust covering everything...even the moldy dishes! You don't want to clean because it would wipe away the traces of him.

It saddens me because the feeling of no longer wanting to live is ... the worst feeling in the world... like you have no purpose... he was your purpose and now he's gone.

Ahhhh... adding to my favorites so I can come back to read it when I'm in one of my mopey moods and need to cry.