Rainfall of Indifference

by Drew Gold   Aug 30, 2005


Sole thoughts plagued with the rot of your remains
more lost, but left impressions of bitter disdain
if theres a feeling for u that still holds true,
its certainly no longer that bright beautiful blue,
thats long since faded, n into my thought the fires invaded
leaving only a schorching red, wishing i was fuc.king dead
but with all in mind, ur still gripping the painful resistance
n with it all behind, i keep slipping on the rainfall of indifference
swallowing all things, everything along with my pride,
slipping and falling, waiting for the tide to subside.
n when im truly finished with the aftermath of u and i,
will there be a path guiding me thru to the other side?
n if so, will you be so kind as to finally say goodbye?

"n when im truly finished with the aftermath of u and i,"

Grammatically, this line is incorrect. i'll probably fix it sometime.. but for now ill leave it in its first write.. It's an older one,..

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  • 18 years ago

    by Lenny

    Ok first of all I LOVE IT,
    I think that that is definitely my favourite piece,
    Its easy to relate to, flows well, despite the grammatically incorrect line, has a wondeful structure and its simplicity makes it an absolute joy to read. The only thing thats disappointing is the swearing which kind of kills the poem or any poem for that matter, if only you would put the correct spelling..................
    Lol,
    Lovin' it

  • 18 years ago

    by Hard2Heal

    Drew,
    I really enjoyed that poem. I think that you should just leave it as it is. any gramatical errors make it origional and yours. you have some amazing poetry and i really enjoy reading it. keep up the great work. If you want you could maybe check out some of my work too. or if not its all cool. later
    ~Hard2Heal

  • 18 years ago

    by undying blusher

    I would definitely suggest you go back and fix it. By not writing out certain words, the grammatical errors, it created too much of a distraction, and took away from the beauty of the piece. Other than that, I would say it’s deep and has originality to it…
    Just fix it please :)

    xxx

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