I seen this in the contest! And it's alot better then my one. There's not really much to say about it.. But it was good. I really liked the second stanza alot. You worded it really well. =) 5/5

`Taleeee. xx.

I love the choice of words, they're very vivid.

I also liked the word choice! kinda mysterious! nice!

Beautiful Sedoka! Very deep and meaningful

Never read much of this style but the words are deep, an interesting in a way. I wish I could say more though

"can we say that there lies fear"
['That' just didn't do it for me. It made the line sound forced for syllables.]
take out 'that' and add an adjective to 'fear' such as, great, dark, deep etc.

Also, "within the foreboding depths?"
I counted 8 syllables. 'foreboding' having 4.

Good stuff though.

Short formated poems like this are hard to write well, because you only have a little room to share a big message. I like the way you wrote this poem, and I do think you wrote it well. You contenpation of darkness and it's two sides was insiteful and an interesting thought. Thank you for shaping this poem.

-Tainted

This was good. i get the message. very creative. 5/5

tiffany

It was really great. I also love your choice of words. Great job!

You have used good wordchoice to put a strong meaning in a short poem and lovely imagery. well done xxALLYxx

I really enjoyed the connection between the title and the poem. Without the title I would never have realised what the poem was about. Well, for me anyway I was left with a rather haunting feeling, as if you were showing how we may fear the dark but with faith we will find the beauty within.
I enjoyed the word usage espeically "therein". A wonderful sedoka, a beautiful, haunting write.

Well, for starters, im not an expert with these types of poetry, but as far as diction and intellegible talk goes, this one does deserve a 5.. its kinda short, so i cant say a lot bout it, but from wat i understood from it, its truthful and honest.. does make a reader think..

keep going
take care
NannO

OHHHHH I like the point! Everyone usually thinks of dark as scary and un welcoming but you made it as mysteriously beautiful!!!!!! Very nice! I never saw a sedoka poem before but now I want to write one! Excellent word choices! I love the word "foreboding" Idk why but thats like one of my faverote words and you used it in your poem! 5/5

A very nice write, although i don't really understand poems like that normally this one showed emotion and i like it heaps. Keep writing.

Pip xxx

Wow.. very good! those lines were so powerful and strong! all the syllable counts worked well, and the beautiful words you used made it even better! great write! 5/5

Pretty good! it lacked a little bit of emotion but it still kept me at a 5. creative and that was awesome!!

Nicely done. Nice choice of words... haven't done a Sedoka myself before, but I like it... short yet deep and open for interpretation. Good write. 5/5

Its odd but it seems to me like something that would be said in a movie trailer for a cool film. Love the words like "vast" and "foreboding" and "majestic" in it because they help make it bold.