BLACK

Nice rhymes...nice message.5/5

You have alot of descriptions in this poem that are good, but then I have to say in some parts it loses what the original merssage is about. Not saying it is good but I think if youcut down just a tad bit the reader may walk away with a better idea of what you are trying to convey. Plot121

I really don't like your format.
It's as if as though you don't know what you're doing.. so you just space it at almost every word.

Look for a more structured format.
I think that'd help :]

The good thing about your format is that...
It made it sound really, well, poetic.

I can actually see this being read in a poetry club.

Your punctuation needs work.
For example:

My heart is still[[.]]
You don't need a period there.

All in all.
It was alright.
It wasn't exactly the best I've read.
Wasn't exactly the worst.
The only thing that brought your rating down for me was that...
There was nothing that caught my eye.
There was no mystery in it.

It's just... well.
A lot of whining to me.
Sorry.
4/5?
Darn.
You've got a straight 5.
I guess I won't vote.

Wow. I think that was amazing. I seemed to have gotten your rhythm just right. I was overly impressed. It is something I feel as though I can understand and enjoy. I read what you had said your poetry in your profile. People on this site are constantly downing poems because they arent organized into stanzas of because they have "forced rhyme", and so I fell under it striving to fit the needs of other peoples stanzas in my own poems. I like how you still do your own thing. This poem was fantastic. Your vocabulary usage and descriptions are mainly what got me hooked. And that constant beat I somehow follow. My favorite part of it was
"Nor fount that flows
no tear drops
Upon this black rose"
I am not sure what else to say. This is a great poem though. Any time you need a comment, leave a long and honest comment for me and I will do the same in return. Thank you

God bless

~skittles

Wow. I think that was amazing. I seemed to have gotten your rhythm just right. I was overly impressed. It is something I feel as though I can understand and enjoy. I read what you had said your poetry in your profile. People on this site are constantly downing poems because they arent organized into stanzas of because they have "forced rhyme", and so I fell under it striving to fit the needs of other peoples stanzas in my own poems. I like how you still do your own thing. This poem was fantastic. Your vocabulary usage and descriptions are mainly what got me hooked. And that constant beat I somehow follow. My favorite part of it was
"Nor fount that flows
no tear drops
Upon this black rose"
I am not sure what else to say. This is a great poem though. Any time you need a comment, leave a long and honest comment for me and I will do the same in return. Thank you

God bless

~skittles