I never thought that finding the man I want to grow old with would play out this way. With everything we went through just so we could be together, I'm going to let her get in the way? I think i might run away tonight. Yes a grown women running away from her home, her husband to be, her monster in-laws to be. I can feel all the rage and hurtfulness coming back to me like it was just yesterday I couldn't tell you if I would be breathing in the morning. How can one person make your time to be happy such a living hell? I feel like I'm a child and can't change anything. I don't make enough money to be on my own, nor do he. So she's throwing us out on our asses anyway? I guess I will never be or make enough for her to see me as an actual person. This is the first time in four years I have actually wanted to go back to cutting myself, and drinking until I have no idea what I'm doing, and shooting up beyond belief. I never wanted to go back to that place but i think i'm stuck here again... Drowning it's to familiar.
