Memorials at 12:07 AM

You, yes you. I know you're still alive,
if only between the pages of my eyelids.
You were my first without being my first.
I loved you

before and after the world fell on its inflamed stomach.
Before it crushed us and we had to rebuild a bridge
to our destination, our risen Jerusalem, our newborn future.
You were a peridot while I was just an emerald city and
legends tells me you hold healing powers within your
veins - magic, if I believed that destiny would touch me
that way.

You were my first understanding of love
without the mingled bodies, the misplaced passion,
the drunken kisses.
I cared for you

the way a star shines its brightest
in its last moments, all to light the path for a lonely soul.

I have yet to be answered by God or his angels.
If I were born into another universe, in another galaxy
would you be kept in my heart the way I keep
trying to surface through the rapid memories?

Where will I lay you to rest?
When may I no longer be a birthstone in an
era, a revolution, without you?