You Know Who You Are.

by Teria   Mar 22, 2008


You Know Who You Are.

Love is a bandaged,
that dies in your arms.
Never finding peace,
in the buzzer and alarm.

Snooze doesn't help,
it only makes it worse.
With five minute naps,
and a hell of a curse.

When you finally awake,
you're in for a day -
one not worth walking,
but you go on your way.

Charming the world,
with every fake smile.
Walking the roads,
for too long awhile.

You're fighting back tears,
for all that you're worth.
You know who you are,
ruining this earth.

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  • 16 years ago

    by Brittany

    Okay, so.

    You Know Who You Are.
    -- Right from the beginning you totally have me. It's a strong and accusing sentence. Really intriguing to the reader.

    Love is a bandaged,
    that dies in your arms.
    Never finding peace,
    in the buzzer and alarm.
    -- Love this idea, only the first line seems wrong. Like there's a grammatical error.

    Snooze doesn't help,
    it only makes it worse.
    With five minute naps,
    and a hell of a curse.
    -- This reminds me of my mornings before school =P But I love the rhyming here.

    When you finally awake,
    you're in for a day -
    one not worth walking,
    but you go on your way.
    -- I know that feeling. You just have this bad feeling about a day, or you just don't want to face it, but you have to get up anyways.

    Charming the world,
    with every fake smile.
    Walking the roads,
    for too long awhile.
    -- Love this. Can't even really explain what about it I love, I just really like it.

    You're fighting back tears,
    for all that you're worth.
    You know who you are,
    ruining this earth.
    -- I'm not sure I follow the message you're sending out here, but I love the first two lines of this stanza...the very last one seems almost forced, but see if I understood where you were going, I might not think that. So pretty much ignore me in this case =P

    Overall it's an awesome poem. Strong and classy. The rhyming and flow are wonderful.
    Keep it up =]
    5/5.