Where are you now

I`m stumbling through emotions
and I can`t find my words
I`m stuck in this commotion
that makes my heart hurt.
all is gone and lost I have found
I keep searching for the answers
as to where you are now?
broken hearted and left behind
all loved ones departed in a blink of an eye.
Where are you Nanny?
It`s been six long years.
What about you Pappy?
I`ve had recent tears.
Dad why did you try to leave?
Is it because you didn`t love me?
What about the others
that said I love you too
I can`t find none of my lovers
that said I`ll stick by you.
One by one they slowly disappear
I`ve collected this bucket
with a thousand tears.
Where are you all now?
Was I that bad?
Is it the words from my mouth
that sent you all back?
I dream of you all still
and in that dream you stay alive
I feel like I`m falling downhill
and no one`s there to save my life.
So if I make it, please think of me
If not I hope I can be in your dreams.