Why Cant You Just Be Proud Of Me?

As soon as I handed you the essay.
You pointed out all the mistakes.
You pointed out the 65 as the grade.

You tell me how you knew I would get the bad grade.
You say that I did a half ass job.
Not once did you say "I'm proud of you."

I believe, no I know i did a great job.
I know that that essay was my best work.
I put my whole heart into it.

Why cant you just be proud of me?
That is all I wont.
I try to make you proud.

That is my secret.
My whole life I've tried.
But it never works.

You are always pointing out,
my mistakes. Or blaming me for things.
I've never heard you say "I'm proud or you Nikkie."

It makes me cry.
When you do this.
You don't know how much it hurts.

To have all me hard work.
Be torn apart
by your lack of proudness.

All I want is to hear you say just four words.
But I haven't heard them yet.
But I pry to god that they will come.

And as I fall asleep.
I wonder.
Why can't you just be proud of me?

(this is to my stepmother.)