This is your life (draft)

by emma   Jun 6, 2008


I have a picture,
and it's of you,
you're looking away,

i didn't know you,
i was just a whisper,
you were free then,

ten years later,
married again,
and she's stuffed,

give up your dream,
go study hard,
dreams don't pay bills,

you didn't want me,
i ruined it,
you told me,

now, where are you?
where's your girl?
you ain't a boy from grimsby,

now you're an old man
and you're ill
and you're alone

this is about my dad but not for him, thanks for reading it!

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Latest Comments

  • 15 years ago

    by Poet on the Piano

    Hey,
    I think you could be more descriptive, and give more examples here, it just kinda of dragged on. So I would say, put more feeling/emotion into it, and be more descriptive in writing this. You could add a lot more in the lines. Try to keep the reader interested and wanting more by the end of the poem. Take care, and keep writing! :)