Your Knight in Shining Armor

I liked this. pretty descriptive about the battle with yourself. i likey!!!

In my first comment not all went through. I meant to give an example of smoothing the rhythm by shortening lines without changing the meaning. I appologize for this but the battery back-up/surge protector I use sometimes does weird things.

I really like your story line here but your metre/rhythm is all over the place.
"I'm wounded from battle
Stagnant and defenseless
Residing in my sin
Warped in this dark abyss"

As in many other works your rhymes are off a bit ie. seen/dreams, succeeded/defeated.
As always an opinion.

Not very good? I don't think I saw any flaws in this. Don't say it's not very good :) Because you never know what other readers are going to think. I think you did a wonderful job. The rhyming was great. I don't know how people can make their poems rhyme! I know I can't. Anyways...5/5
Nicely written.

Good write...
The way you have described the battle with yourself is nice... but you could have made the first part little more stronger.. this is just a suggestion.. I felt the latter part more stronger...

'This is a battle between myself
It's a battle that can't be won
I'm dying to find a release
So my mistakes can be undone '

^^ the ending is wonderful... this stanza is very powerful...

keep writing..