What I've done

*For a contest*

My darling, my lover, my only,
You gave me a desire for life's control,
For three years that lasted a century,
I watched death step in and steal your soul.

I wished only to bring you courage,
I wanted to save you from fate's cold grip,
But I failed to be your enduring hero,
I did more than just mess up or slip.

Three days prior to be taken away from me,
It became to much to bear, loosing you,
All my emotions escaped me and not sweetly,
I screamed, "This isn't the life I wanted to pursue!"

"I've sit be silently watching you die,
Yet you don't notice it's killing me too,
Offer me something-help me let go,
Some type of goodbye is way overdue."

Softly you asked me to leave and return later,
It was the last time I stood by your side,
I let you travel to a world beyond this,
Without even showing to help be your guide.

So now I awake to cold each morning,
Resting on my heart, weighing me down,
Remembering you fading away into pain,
Never complaining, always masking your frown.

My conscience won't let me forget you,
You're like a record on repeat,
I can't destroy your memory,
You're haunting me into defeat.

Over and over the moments play through my mind,
I was weak, not a savior at all,
I will live with this guilt everyday of my life,
Remembering that I'm my own downfall.