Wow......that was beautiful......i loved the stanza

"Her heart sank like the titanic
She felt like she should die
She started to weep
She was lonely"

5/5

I understand the meaning of this poem and the repeat of the phrase she was lonley , dose it indicate that today she is not loney , becasue you use the past ,

second you speak SHE , like it dont refer to you , and like it is another perosn , i like this term , but you seem repeat this style in all your poem , and i think you should add more emotion to it the type of short lines and repeat usage make the poem empty of feelings no matter how the subject is touchable

you split into pargrah it is a good sign , you should work more on the rhym and the content ,

Well i like this poem alott

Amazing!!

Aww this is a sad piece! Lol but I really am fond of it because of the stanzas and the word choice.

Her heart sank like the titanic
She felt like she should die
She started to weep
She was lonely

My favorite line right there! I love the metaphors! The reference to the titanic is so deep. Love it!

Well i have kinda always had a problem with short poems like such. They usually cant get the story out or the point. This on the other hand did very very well... bravo.. congrats.

5/5
Keep it up
Take Care

I like this poem because i can relate to it a little!

WOW that was a really good poem!!!*hug*

That was really good
sad but good

"Her heart sank like the titanic"
Aww, beautifully writting. Well done.
5/5

I liked it its good.

I really liike this one, bcuz i had a similar expirence wtih a boy.

Wow amazing

5\5

Again needs more visualization i will help you with that if you ask me too or want me to it gets the meaning across but that is not always enough to some readers they wanna feel the poem beat with their own heart inside there chest

I enjoy the way you put it down. cant find any other words to describe it.

This is really good!

"She fell to her knees
With a dagger in her hands
She wanted to die
She was lonely"

That part was my favorite! It was a beautiful part, emotion flowed through the words there the most.

Very powerful, I liked it.

Read this poem my brother wrote it 3 years ago We to are still lonely but i think in another way...

What Happened?

by Ian Regalado

My Father is a man
He had a plan
My Father payed the bills
He may have killed
My Mother is dead
She felt the hot lead
My Father cheated
My mother got treated
Some say my Mother could not pull that trigger
And that it was that stupid nigger
How could she die when I was a kid
Why did she pop her lid ?
I thought she would never leave
I couldn't believe
I thought it was a lie
But there were pools of water under my eyes
What does that do to two baby's and a boy
All people did was give us toys
Did all that pain
Make me go insane
Am I crazy or
Am I just lazy
How can I finish this story
That has no glory
There is no hero
Now I'm just a zero
How can I finish if I don't know it all
I just want a better way to fall

Good job...I like it

Wonderful poem. I'v felt the same way about a girl.