I remember when.......

Interesting couplets filled with emotion

"You first said it to"
to = too

I think this is an okay poem. The repition isn't really that bad and usually I'm not too fond of when it's repeated like that, that many times. But it was okay. I thought the ending was decent compared to the rest of the poem and the poem itself was okay.

Good Job.

Very nice poem.

I remember when
you still said "I love you"

I remember when
You first said it to

Something about that just doesn't fit right though. I think it's the part that says, "you first said it to" I just don't know what about that, that could be changed.

And as you said, it didn't end quite right. But all together it is a good poem. Wish you would have put more feeling into it though.

It worked well to me. It had emotion and flow throughout the poem. I liked how you kept using I remember when because it just lets you keep reading what you remember and how you think about those situations. Great job

-Dan

Great lines~

I remember when
the days went by so fast

I remember when
we reminisced about the past

Very emotional. 5/5. Keep on writting!