Completely Incomplete

by Curing the Comon Cliche   Sep 15, 2008


Now the pen's on paper
What words will burn out now?
So much spent faking happiness
Now you forgot how

Songs in your head
They scream you sublime
Feel all feeling slipping
Losing grip on time

The second bar is broken
Dark water at your feet
Two words replay in your head
Completely incomplete

The fire in the music
Burns behind your eyes
This poem is over
This poem just died

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Latest Comments

  • 15 years ago

    by DreamingOutLoud

    The fire in the music
    Burns behind your eyes
    - the person you were trying to be has just killed you inside <

    Just a suggestion, but you need to re-write the two last lines; and then your poem should sound better because its got so much significance throughout it and the last two lines kind of take away that.
    but over-all nice work.

  • 15 years ago

    by StandStill

    I don't know what to say about this one. i do like it though...5/5

  • 15 years ago

    by Sora

    Wow. i loved this! it was so different from anything i've read all day, and for awhile. i love the title it's quite eye catching. you got your message across well also. you chose your words wisley and it turned out perfectly. and the ending was great. job well done. 5/5.

    -Ashlei.

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