Here`s to you

I believe you love me but not as much as you say
If you really loved me you`d be here today
you wouldnt find a reason to stay where you are
you`d find you`re way here by bus train or car
but that is not the case and you can`t even call
sometimes i wonder why i even try at all.
the harder i try, the smaller i feel
its like im reaching for something thats not real.
I try and try every day
and sometimes you take that pride away.
you make it seem like you try much more
it makes me wonder what I`m trying for.
It`s always been so hard for you
but you`d see it in me if you knew the truth.
I hate the fact feeling that I have to
do things for you and say I love you too.
I thought you could see what was in my heart
yet you can only see when it falls apart.
My words can be harsh but how else can I say
That I finally realized i dont need you today.