Comments : Face the Music

  • 10 years ago

    by Courageous Dreamer

    "Golden dreams of forever are in our grasp,
    Only to slip through the cracks like sand."
    `Wonderful simile, I was impressed. :]

    "Giving up the only hand we ever wanted to hold."
    `Did you mean never here? Instead of ever?

    "Why is it that we hurt the ones we love most,
    Never realizing the pain they feel is our pain too,"
    `Wow! Amazing question.. this really makes me wonder as well. I love all these great questions because it really makes the reader think, and I love that!

    "Why when we are supposed to face the music,"
    `I have always loved this idiom (right?) face the music.. I'm not sure why, but for once I found it and I loved the way you used it here. :] I loved how you threw that in here because you don't hear that phrase all too often.. it was a unique twist I thought. So well done.

    "Maybe because with time we learn to understand,
    We don't always have to face the music, to hear it."
    `Powerful powerful powerful ending! Maybe that is why.. maybe. You never really know. I loved how you kind of stated your opinion here..

    Well done overall.
    Flow was flawless.
    Amazing write.

    5/5.

  • 10 years ago

    by Finalgravedigger

    A very good poem, truly superior emotionallly and poetically, i know how it feels and you have true depiction nice work.

  • 10 years ago

    by Dark Savior

    I liked this read and felt that it was very true, it's one of the poems that you actually think "yeah...this has happened"

    I enjoyed this poem and felt that it was one of the more relatable ones that I've read in a little while.

    I don't really have any advice for you at this moment, I think that the poem is great the way it is.

    5/5

  • 10 years ago

    by Sweet Disposition

    Giving up the only hand we ever wanted to hold.

    These were my favourite lines. Overall, a very nice piece

  • 10 years ago

    by Rachel RTVW

    What a powerful piece this is. One that many can relate to, I am sure. Extremely thought provoking. Excellent job!

  • 10 years ago

    by Kimberley

    That was just so amazing i don't know what to tell you. this is going into my favourites. it was amazing. i just... can so relate. you have an amazing talent. keep it up. 10000000000000000000000000000/5 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ~KM~

  • 10 years ago

    by Avan Ahmad

    WOW!^_^ tat was amazing! i think it was a great poem looking forward reading your other poems.Every word in there was true and I think we all have the same questions.

  • 10 years ago

    by snezana

    Absolutely amazing! The first piece I come across on this site in two years, and it really blew me away! Very well done!

  • 10 years ago

    by BornAgainWriter

    WHOOOOOOOOOOA
    HANDS DOWN
    OMGOODNESS
    okay I need a moment to gain control here.

    ...

    Okay, so...this poem number one I LOVE MUSIC. I always find words in music to describe what ever emotion I'm feeling that day. Whooa.

    All those questions, are what I'm feeling. But I don't...but them into questions..Only words.

    You are a great poet. And I LOOOOVE this poem.

  • 10 years ago

    by Inside the Liar

    Wow. Very nice technique. I loved the rhymes you used. I also related to the poem itself. I really liked it. You seem to have a good feel for poetry. 5/5

  • 10 years ago

    by Bugg

    "Why do we force ourselves to say I'm sorry,
    To give away a destiny we once controlled,
    Risk losing a world we could never live without,
    Giving up the only hand we ever wanted to hold."

    I love that stanza, especially the last line. I thought that your poem was beautiful. Keep up the great work. :) It definitely deserves a 5

  • 10 years ago

    by DarkCrystalbtrfy

    1st stanza:
    Why is it that when a heart is broken,
    The right words are always easiest to find,
    When our chance has long come and gone,
    To speak the truth that was on our mind.

    the rhyme schem here is on track as well as the rythm of the peom. I can defenatly relate to how you can find the right words only when the true chnace is gone. The picture of chance leaving is a strong one, opprtunites are like leaves in the wind.

    2nd stanza:
    Why do we make life altering mistakes,
    All the while knowing the fate at hand,
    Golden dreams of forever are in our grasp,
    Only to slip through the cracks like sand.

    Slip through the cracks like sand what a powerfull image. the parallel that you make between dreams and sand is good as well.

    3rd stanza:
    Why do we force ourselves to say I'm sorry,
    To give away a destiny we once controlled,
    Risk losing a world we could never live without,
    Giving up the only hand we ever wanted to hold.

    while reading this I can defenatly realate to not wanting to give something up. to me that is the biggest part of writing a poem. Beaing able to write so that others can relate to your work.

    4th stanza:
    Why is it that we hurt the ones we love most,
    Never realizing the pain they feel is our pain too,
    Putting ourselves in a situation to reflect our past,
    speechless at best, with apologies long overdue.

    Here you suddenly switch from rhyme to proes. is there a reason why you did this? You still have good rythm though.

    5th stanza:
    Why when we are supposed to face the music,
    Do we turn our backs with regret we'll never admit,
    Maybe because with time we learn to understand,
    We don't always have to face the music, to hear it.

    overall Your poem has good imadgry. while reading it as a whole I could defenatly get a clear picture of what you were talking about. It dosent waver in the sense of wording. I also like the way you have the poem in stanzas. That helps break the peom apart, for the reader to better understand it.
    Well Written

  • 10 years ago

    by kate

    This poem was excellent honestly, i never read anything like this before. It made me think though because everytime something happens good or bad in our lives we always hear some certain songs we can relate to, at the right moments and sometimes at the bad moments i think thats how life is crazy sometimes how it just happens like that.

    keep it up.
    keep on writing.
    love always and forever.

  • 10 years ago

    by kelleyana

    I enjoy my read. Very meaningful. Sometimes when we are in love, the heart is so filled that words aren't enough to express what we feel about our partner. Sometimes in couples life, at first they'll told the one the love how much He/she means to them, then with time they thought it doesn't make sense to repeats this kind gesture everyday because he/she knew already, but this is so not the case. Then with time they feel as if they're just like they're transparent and ended everything. Until they when you're alone, you realized what had went wrong and your mind overflow with thinking. As say the proverb" You never miss the water until the well runs dry".
    I think it's the first time i read your poems and i do like them. It merits 5/5, Keep it up, kel.

  • 10 years ago

    by Lori

    Wow. This is oh, so beautiful. I truly loved it. My favorite thing about it was how creative and in-depth this was. It was gorgeous and I find your writing quite talented. Also, I could feel your emotions spilling out of it. Like I said, the depth in this is outstanding. But I found the stanzas almost too much for me. It was alot to swallow throughout the whole thing. But it was just a little thing.Not a big deal :)

    Why is it that when a heart is broken,
    The right words are always easiest to find,
    When our chance has long come and gone,
    To speak the truth that was on our mind.

    ^^"To speak the truth that was on our mind" I found that line very beautiful and this stanza is a very good opening for a poem like this. Actually, it's the PERFECT opening for this poem. I'm a big fan for this. Awesome!

    Why do we make life altering mistakes,
    All the while knowing the fate at hand,
    Golden dreams of forever are in our grasp,
    Only to slip through the cracks like sand.

    ^LOVE IT! I love this stanza. And it's absoluly true also. "only to slip through the cracks like sand" WOW! That was beautiful and I found myself really into this poem. Excellent write! Let me know when you write another :) You are really quite talented! Great work!!

  • 9 years ago

    by Michael D Nalley

    It is wise to face the music no matter what mood is invoked and this is reflected very well in this searching poem