I hate this feeling

by Sweet lig   Dec 2, 2008


I hate myself in every ways

I hate this life for some reasons

I hate my heart seems i cant control

I hate the way i feel so alone

I hate someone who lie on me

I hate this love i feel, that cause me pain

I hate everyday for thinking my love

I hate because it drive me crazy

I hate because it feels me so down

I hate because my life was misery

I hate this feeling...

and i think i cant take it anymore!

i really feel so anger myself so i just express it by writing this... its up to u what do u think but thank u for reading..

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Latest Comments

  • 15 years ago

    by PoetryKnight

    I really like it. it shows true emotion. Not like the ever more written too many time The things I hate about you that is always done in ten. lol. I think you have wonderful talent. keep it up, 5/5

    Aaron

  • 15 years ago

    by Finalgravedigger

    I can truly relate, your poem was a nice write but im just suggesting to perhaps show some more detail to your pain^^.

  • 15 years ago

    by Teria

    Ways = way
    on = to OR about
    cause = causes

    "I hate because it drive me crazy

    I hate because it feels me so down"

    [ I hate it because it's driving me crazy.
    I hate it because it's making me down]

    "I hate because my life was misery"
    [I hate it because my life is misery]

    You've an amazing poem here. I do however think the grammical errors need changed. They're not horrible but they do mess with the way it portrays the feeling. You've got the poetic ways down, you just need to work on your wording (grammical ways)

  • 15 years ago

    by Dark Savior

    I hate myself in every ways
    -take off the S no need to pluralize it.
    I hate this life for some reasons
    -take off the s in reasons no need to pluralize again.
    I hate my heart seems i cant control
    -I hate my heart I can't seem to control. I believe that should be it.
    I hate the way i feel so alone
    -capitalize the I
    I hate someone who lie on me
    -I hate someone who lies to me
    I hate this love i feel, that cause me pain
    -Causes it should be "Causes"

    I hate everyday for thinking my love
    -not sure. I believe "For Thinking of m love"

    I hate because it feels me so down
    - "Because it makes me feel so down"

    I hate because my life was misery
    - "I hate my life because it's misery"

    and i think i cant take it anymore!
    -I don't think I can take it anymore!

    I apologize if I sort of chopped apart your poem, but those are the grammarical errors that really prevent you from reading a poem that I feel has a lot of raw emotion and potential in it.

    This is a very well done poem if you push past all the errors that are done with this.

    5/5

  • 15 years ago

    by kelleyana

    Well, well you seems so much vexed with yourself. I think it just because you're so confused. I think as someone mention before too much 'hate', it takes away the beauty of your poem. I hope you're in a better mood now, kel. It merits 4.5/5, kel.