A viscous circle

I decided,
From here on out,
I would look in the mirror,
I'd face my self doubt,

I can't compliment myself,
But I'll admit some things,
'cause lying to yourself,
Is one of the worst things,

I never liked my family,
They were always mean to me,
I didn't have many friends,
People never stayed long enough,

When I was small I liked sweets,
Now I can't stand them,
Now they taste bitter to me,

When I walked to my cousins house,
I smiled brightly,
That was a lie,
I knew we were gonna fight,

When I walked to school each morning,
With a tear struck face,
And they asked me why I was crying,
I said nothing,
I was lying,

When My mom told me we were moving,
I never looked her in the eyes,
Because I knew one look in my sad blue eyes,
She'd know I was dying inside,
That I was lying,

Now My blue eyes still cry,
As I admit these things,
It's not a mystery to me,
I love everything,
And lying is a way of life,

I didn't want anyone to hurt,
Not because of me,
Yet They don't want me to hurt,
Because of them,
A viscous circle,
That sadly never ends.