Playing for Keeps

by Cantchangeme   Feb 24, 2009


All paths lead to here
They never lead away
Stuck at the end of a road that crumbles
While memories fade to grey

In the darkness nothing moves
There is no air to fill our lungs
Everything is blank and still
We bake under the absent sun

The saints sin themselves
As sinners roll the dice
The pictures in your head your only solace
In a never ending night

Our hearts beat for the last time
Now in the air there is no sound
The past is your present forever
You lie motionless on the ground

This is our eternity
Never awaking, never asleep
Angels fight saints for riches
Whilst sinners play for keeps

2


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Latest Comments

  • 10 years ago

    by Midnight Sky

    Really good no words can say how this poem is 5\5 :)

  • 12 years ago

    by ganjaru

    The past is your present forever .
    wow this line is a killer!
    well bcuz i can relate, i can say it is true ..
    i love your style too 5/5 .,

  • 14 years ago

    by Chocolate Addict

    This is an interesting write I like the contrast that you have presented in this poems...between the saints & sinners etc.
    Great Job

  • 15 years ago

    by Hatori

    The fact that you wrote on a unique topic makes this poem a good read and the first stanza was a great way to grab the readers attention. However, the poem itself didn't really grab my full attention. Like it was on the brink of it, but just needs to go that little bit further. So maybe something to add. One thing I did notice was in this stanza:

    "The saints sin themselves
    As sinners roll the dice
    The pictures in your head your only solace
    In a never ending night"

    I think perhaps if you made the third line a bit shorter so it flowed with the rest of the piece, that stanza would be rather charming. Even if you took off "your only solace," but that's for you to decide.

    Overall, the topic was intruiging, but I'd have liked to see more power behind it. Keep it up 4/5

    --Hari

  • 15 years ago

    by umbra

    You did a great job using imagery in this poem. I could picture these scenes in my mind as I read. It is a humbling look at the entrophy that in the end consumes us all. I especially like the comparisons drawn between the paragons of good and sinners.