I Need to Know (for my Dad)

I know I've been raised,
And I know I've hated you,
But I can't go on without knowing,
And what is really true?

I can't back down now,
I've been waiting for so long,
You need to know all that I've written,
And tell me what you think of my song.

What do you really think of me?
What do you think of my future?
I want only the truth, and nothing but,
Because you've made me so insecure.

Sometimes after we have a big fight,
I wish I was never here,
Just so I didn't have to endure the pain,
So I only felt my deadly fear.

I always wondered if you cared,
Or am I just some person in the mist?
It really kills me, but I put on an act,
Surrounding myself in imaginary bliss.

All my life I've wondered,
I need to know why you left me,
Over time I fed my mind lies,
Coating me in misery.

I don't want to hate you,
But I can't deny the past,
I still feel the pain,
And that I can't forget so fast.

I want to make a new start,
But I admit I'm afraid,
Still my feelings are rapid,
Like a tangled braid.

I told you how I feel,
Now it's your turn,
Show your shed of light,
And stop letting my heart burn.