Situation of fear

I'm caught in a situation...
One I don't want to acknowledge..
What do I say...what do I do...

Fear of what I know
Fear of what I don't know
Fear of what I will be betryed as...

Everyone wants to know..
What I may know..what I remember
Hell...it happened so many years ago

God... I'm so confused..I want to help put this man away
But I'm feeling so fearful and defensive
All I want to do is run away

What is the right thing to do..
What do I choose
Silence
Or
Speak up of what I can remember

Do I put myself through hell on earth
Not just me but my family
Knowing that his defense attorney
Will look to completely destory me

I'm such a mess
Nightmares, can't eat, can't sleep..nausea and actual vomiting
I finally told my family and the love and support
Has really helped me

My heart and gut says to speak up
Yet my head says shut the hell up

God I'm so confused
What the hell desicion should I choose..
Do I speak about what little I remember
Or reprogram myself to forget what I do remember

Fear
Fear
Its all about my damn fear....I guess I need to decide whether I hide behind it or stand up to the fear...

I don't know which I'll do...