The Red light

Two nights ago,
I became that girl.

two nights ago,
I viewed myself
as that trashy harlot
I never wanted to be..

he was taken,
as a matter of fact
he is taken, and
I have my heart
somewhere else, way elsewhere.

but they are nights,
when the body feels hollow
when all you are,leaves
you stranded, and you're left
there, brainless.

with a decision to make.

he's gorgeous, I bet
he was planned. he was
wanted when he came
into this world.

you can take that
from the color of his
honey green eyes, and
the curve of his bottom lip.

made with patience,
'cause tho there are
no strings attached
he treated me like a queen-
not because I was in my
kingdom , but because
its who he is.

but I'm not
here to compliment him,
nor to find excuses
to tie to my actions as
If It was some sort
of try your luck game.

I won't get away with that.

two nights ago,
I viewed myself as
the trashy harlot I never
wanted to be.

and when he
said the walls felt good
on the inside, I knew
he was not speaking
of those I had built
around my heart, because
he has never gotten in there.

still, I chose to lay
there, my body, under his.
with my mind screaming
a thousand hurtful things.

I could blame it on my age,
but I've been walking ahead of
it for ages now.

yesterday morning,
I washed all my sheets,
but, dawny didn't soften this
burden, and clorox lost its
battle against a shame stain.

two nights ago,
I viewed myself as
that trashy harlot I never
wanted to be.

I feel, like I'm something
I can't be proud of anymore.

and he, he's alright.
kicking balls in a soccer field,
waiting to feel lonely again.