by silvershoes   May 22, 2012

Maybe I was the ocean, come crashing in,
and you were the stream, undisturbed on a quiet path,
when the estuary had us met.
Maybe I overthrew your steady course
with spring tides, over-bounding in unbridled zest,
and you were floundering in my wave shock.

You were the sun after all, meera suraj, and it is said
I was the moon; your moon; terri jund -
riddled with pock marks and wearing away from use,
but still beautiful to your perfect, immortal eyes.

Could it be that gravitational forces pulled our hearts,
like magnets, toward the earth's imperfect face?
And when we struck upon her, like meteors, the waters
nearly had us drowned?
You were grabbing at my neck then, with frenzied claws,
while I struggled to keep us afloat,
then we were swept haphazardly, two poor beached whales,
to the dunes where we first made love.

It wasn't enough.

In the years that followed,
a series of violent storms put out the lanterns in your eyes.
You saw me suddenly as I am - as I always have been, but
not as you thought me to be. What then but to feel the fool?
When I stood again before you, naked, with outstretched arms
like shredded sails on a sinking ship,
you failed to cast your rope.
Instead, tides yanked my vessel further offshore,
the lighthouse pinched its flame,
and I watched your back as you strode down the beach
away from my demise.

Already forgotten were the smells of salted breeze;
the glimmer of phosphorescence;
the caress of moonlight on vulnerable skin.
You had kissed the ocean's lips goodbye
without ever truly leaving.


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Latest Comments

  • 9 years ago

    by Britt

    Comment from judging:

    A play by play of a beautiful relationship gone violent (in the metaphorical, ocean sense).. this is a heartbreaking poem with beautiful images and another poem so many can relate to. I love the title and how perfectly it fits, and was quite fond of the structure, with really long lines, some much shorter. It didn't feel rushed and the pace was perfect. What a piece

  • 9 years ago

    by Maple Tree

    The elegant nature tones of this heart breaking love poem just really captivated me-
    This is a wonderful poem. Beautiful inside and out with clear detailed imagery, with tender wording throughout-
    The title relates to the poem well and such a beautiful setting with this metaphoric delight.

    The poem is spoken in truth from a poet who pours her heart out with such elegance and detailed beauty.
    I really adore the way you compare the currents to two hearts becoming one-
    Its relatable to life love and pain...

    This is a fantastic poem and one of my favorites from this author-
    Well done Silvershoes

  • 9 years ago

    by Naughtymouse

    One day....i will comment on this, but right now i am unable to ......OMG this is AMAZING! i feel like im in shock and awe.....Sigh!


  • 10 years ago

    by Yakari Gabriel



  • 10 years ago

    by Tara Kay

    Jane, I loved this piece, it was superbly written with the metaphors that were beautiful and I can feel the emotion in me, the way you captured it was outstanding


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