Drunk... and for what?

The bed -
it beckons me.
And I somehow
don't worry
about all my missteps,
all my human errors
and embarrassing moments.
I surrender myself
to you, and wonder, for the
near thousandth time this month,
if I'm making the right decision.

Soon, I'll be outside of these four walls -
I'll be a stranger in a city I never
cared to understand before.

And I don't know, if this is foolish,
if I should have just ran away,
if I should have given up,
because I don't know who I am

when it's just me and the vodka
at the bottom of my cup;

it's a lonely night.

Lonely is what I know, though.
And I wish I knew more.

I wish I knew you.

I wish I knew the extent of me,
and everything I have to offer.

____________________

Freewrite.