What do i do now?

Filled with false hopes, I act out on impulse
Now all I do is think ugly thoughts and convulse
I continue, with shades of depression darkening my face
Everybody wonders, but how do you describe this place?
Empty, alone, filled with questions
No creativity, only delayed digestion
Slow, ever spinning, like a prize less wheel
Regardless of the fact that none of this is real
Untapped and intangible, this is the worst place imaginable
No comfort, no consolement, only an empty dial tone
It’s a downward spiral, and now the spirals grown
Where are the answers I continually seek?
Why does the future seem so bleak?
Looking to a future, what is the use?
My bindings have all become too loose.
My mind's slipping into the quick sand
My only unused option is an unbalanced mental handstand.
Everything in this lifetime is already upside down
What’s the big deal with donning an outright frown?
My only passion is relieving others of their stress
There is only one point I'd like to impress
My motives may or may not justify my procedure
I mean if life's just a lesson, where the hell is my teacher?
If it’s only a game, where the rules are learned in time,
I've lost my mind, and it's returned in rhyme
Yesterday’s promises aren't so grand
There is no master plan we need to understand
Live life to the fullest, free from regret
"To live is to love” so forgive and forget....