Stained Bathroom mat

Tiny red blood polka-dots decorate the white floor mat
As I thought of reasons to live where I sat,
Thought of me on the outside looking in
Staring at the stained mat saying I’ll never win

I say to myself he’ll find me one day
But the price of this lying I just can’t pay
I can tell people that it’s all ok
But really in my pain I still lay

Thinking of him becomes a daily thing
And I wait by the phone begging it to ring
What I do and the pain I bring
All this because of a one-time fling

But I know it’s more than that
As I sit on the bathroom floor mat
Reaching for that razor blade
Thinking of how I use to be afraid

It was so long ago when I first started
I had no clue I’d be this addicted
If I did I wouldn’t have picked up that knife
If I did, I wouldn’t be thinking about ending my life

But as I sit and watch the razor go across
One cut for every tear and loss
The blood, red like roses seeps through
And I feel this is the only thing I can do

Tiny red blood polka-dots decorate the white floor mat
As I thought of reasons to live where I sat,
Thought of me on the outside looking in
Staring at the stained mat saying I’ll never win…